Kia Ora Bloggers!
I have been taking google meets with Miss Green and Phil taking about cybersmart. I have taken lots of new stuff and share it with everyone.
I have made a creative writing with Miss Green's help talking about 3 witches.
Here it is:
Once upon a time there were 3 witches that lived in a big scary castle. Every child that was close to the castle was taken to the children's room so the witches kept them awake so the witches didn't lose their power. And every full moon makes the witches 5 times stronger than before.
They owned a magical watch that can make you time travel and said if it is ever broken the witches would be gone forever. So the 3 witches kept it in a secret hiding spot. The 3 witches are going to use the watch to travel to the future and do terrible things, so Witch number 3 put it in her pocket ready to be used.
A girl in the children's room watched the watch falling out of the pocket and fell next to the door. The girl quickly took the watch and broke it. A loud bang sounded and then a big puff of smoke rose from where the 3 witches were standing. All 3 witches had disappeared and the children lived happily ever after.
Ka pai Yasmin. I really enjoyed reading your story. Those witches were truly terrifying! Well done on writing a clear beginning, middle and end. This can be hard when you are writing a short story. Next time add in some specific descriptive words to explain how each character looks. This will help paint a vivid picture in your reader’s mind. I am looking forward to reading your next story. Blog you later!
ReplyDeleteKia Ora Miss Green!
DeleteThank you so much for your advice and for helping me in my writing.
Yes you are right it is very hard painting a picture in the readers mind with no descriptive words. I love reading and writing so much.
Yes in the next story I will make my writing better and more interesting.
Blog you later
Yasmin